Service Notes

The Gift of Love

If I speak in the tongues of mortals and of angels, but do not have love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give away all my possessions, and if I hand over my body so that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.

Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

Love never ends. But as for prophecies, they will come to an end; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will come to an end. For we know only in part, and we prophesy only in part; but when the complete comes, the partial will come to an end. When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child; when I became an adult, I put an end to childish ways. For now we see in a mirror, dimly, but then we will see face to face. Now I know only in part; then I will know fully, even as I have been fully known. And now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; and the greatest of these is love. (1 Corinthians 13)

A More Excellent Way

Today is Valentine's Day. In a broader context we are talking about love, a more excellent way of loving. We live in a cultural which loves to talk about love, advertise about love, and promote its version of love, but today we are going to examine God's version and idea of love between two people.

As a pastor and as a church we are concerned about marriages on three levels. Sometimes it may seem all the church is doing is railing against divorce, and as tragic as that is, I've often said we ought to be worrying more about who is getting married, more than who is getting divorced, meaning that perhaps if we took pre-marital counseling more seriously and the couple took their preparations more seriously we wouldn't have so many divorces on the other end.

What Do Women and Men Really Want for Valentine's Day?

I asked a few of our staff to respond anonymously to this question, "What do you most want for Valentine's Day." Their answers speak to a much deeper question about what women need from their husbands in general. Guys you had better listen up and take notes.

What Do Men and Women Need from their Spouses?

Marital experts agree women tend need and appreciate time, attention, and affection. Women want to know that they are the most important thing in a man's life. Not the job, not the hobby, not anyone else be it friends or relative. Men have a high need for physical intimacy, companionship, and admiration.

Marriage -- Strong and Flexible

We need routine maintenance in a marriage just as we maintain our cars or heating and air systems. We know more and more about the importance of a routine health physical and annual tests and examines. Don't wait to ask for help. Many couples wait till too much damage has already been done. Many marriages are ill equipped from the beginning and we assume we don't have to work on our marriages along the way.

Resources

Websites

• www.marriagebuilders.com
• www.TheGreatMarriageExperience.com
• www.GoSmalley.com
• www.RealRelationships.com (several videos, online assessments)
• www.Couplecheckup.com (online marital inventory checkup)

Books

• Five Love Languages, by Gary Smalley
• The Love Dare, by Kentrick
• How to Affair Proof Your Marriage, by Willard Harley (don't let the title fool you - a very good book about basic marriage principles)
• How to Argue so Your Spouse Will Listen, by Sharon Morris May
• The Marriage Book: How to Build Lasting Relationships, by Nicky and Sila Lee
• Every Man's Battle: Overcoming Sexual Temptation, by Stephen Arterburn
• Live and Respect, by Emerson Eggerichs
• Sacred Marriage: Celebrating Marriage as a Spiritual Discipline, by Gary Thomas

Divorce

Immanuel Baptist Church (next door to Centenary) periodically offers a Divorce Recovery Workshop -- highly recommended. For details, see Immanuel's website.